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Quote of the Day
“Ladies and gentlemen, most of you already know that with a little love and compassion, any puppy will grow up to be a cuddly little bundle of joy. . . . Stuff and nonsense taught by charlatans and...
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Quote of the Day
♫”And Bingo was his name-0!”♫ – Bart Simpson “Added extra clap. Not college material.” – Kindergarten Teacher Happy birthday Al Jean!
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Sunday Preview: Much Apu About Something
Sanjay passes his stake in the Kwik-E-Mart to his millennial son, Jay, who turns it into a hip, health food market against Apu’s insistence on tradition. Bart, whom Homer had convinced to give up...
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Quote of the Day
“Daddy, when I grow up, I wanna be just like you.” – Ralph Wiggum “Better start eating, kid.” – Skinny Boy “Start eating?” – Wiggum P.I. “I didn’t mean that way!” – Ralph Wiggum Happy Birthday Matt...
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Quote of the Day
“If it isn’t my old friends from Springfield, the Simpsons! What brings you folks to New Orleans?” – Clancy Wiggum, P.I. “Mardi gras, man! When the Big Easy calls, you gotta accept the charges.” –...
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Sunday Preview: Lisa The Veterinarian
After performing CPR on a tased raccoon, Lisa discovers her calling to be veterinarian and becomes an intern at the local office, but learns a tough lesson when her neglected class hamster dies....
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Sunday Preview: The Marge-ian Chronicles
Not feeling unique, Lisa signs up for the Mars One Space Colony – to Marge’s dismay. Then, Marge hires Bart to go through the tryout process with Lisa to make her want to quit. Lisa doesn’t feel...
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Attention Star Wars and Star Trek Fans, Geeks, and General Enjoyers
“No, I do not have a receipt. I won it as a door prize at the Star Trek convention. Although I find their choice of prize highly illogical, as the average Trekker has no use for a medium size belt.” –...
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Sunday Preview: The Burns Cage
Smithers is upset with Mr. Burns’ lack of affection towards him, so Homer plays matchmaker and tries to find him a boyfriend. Meanwhile, Bart maneuvers the removal of the lead in the school production...
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Sunday Preview: How Lisa Got Her Marge Back
After a mother-daughter spat, Marge takes Lisa to Capital City, where, after enjoying a musical, the show’s star sings Marge’s praises to remind Lisa how lucky she is to have such a special mom....
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Quote of the Day
“Hello, Principal Dondelinger.” – Marge Simpson “Oh, Marge Bouvier, it’s so good to see you. Sorry, sir, we’re not letting vagrants sleep in the gym tonight. But we will be putting some scraps by the...
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Reading Digest: French Middle School Kids Edition
“Bonjour, you cheese eating surrender monkeys.” – Groundskeeper Willie I may still try to get these up on Thursdays, but that didn’t even come close to happening yesterday. On the plus side, we’ve got...
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Quote of the Day
“Ooh, trouble in the neighborhood. I’m his neighbor. What’d he do?” – Homer Simpson Happy birthday Bill Kopp!
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Quote of the Day
“Hello, what’s this? Wire hangers? Expired medicine? Old newspapers! Okay, Homer, stay calm. Just quietly get this stuff inside your house. Homer! You’re not listening!” – Homer Simpson Happy birthday...
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Reading Digest: Prince Non-Prince Edition
“And tonight, the following celebrities have been arrested.” – Kent Brockman If you’re binging on Prince-internet right now, there is one link for you below and that’s it. Other than that we’ve got...
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Sunday Preview: Fland Canyon
Homer recalls a tense family vacation to the Grand Canyon with the Flanders family It appears FOX is now putting as much effort into writing their episode descriptions as I have been at previewing...
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Reading Digest: Link Patrol Blows It
“Food patrol, we’re all starved! Let’s see what you’ve got. That’s it? What happened to all the lobsters, mangoes, and chewy chewy cocoa beans?” – Bart Simpson It’s a seriously short Reading Digest...
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Quote of the Day
“At auction, I’d expect this to bring twenty to thirty-thousand dollars, except that on the handle somebody’s carved ‘Homer Rocks’.” – Antique Lady “And I do!” – Homer Simpson
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Quote of the Day
“Hey,Bart, our dad says your dad is incompetent.” – Sherri “What does incompetent mean?” – Bart Simpson “It means he spends more time yakking and scarfing down donuts than doing his job.” – Terri “Oh,...
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Quote of the Day
“A non-profit organization with oil? I won’t allow it! An oil well doesn’t belong in the hands of Betsy Bleedingheart and Maynard G. Muskievote!” – C.M. Burns Happy birthday Josh Weinstein!
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